


Another Side

by clarency



Series: Sides series [2]
Category: Hogan's Heroes
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Feels, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-10
Updated: 2012-10-10
Packaged: 2017-11-16 01:20:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/533904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clarency/pseuds/clarency
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One day, his strength would waver</p>
            </blockquote>





	Another Side

Whenever he closed his eyes at night, he knew the shadows would creep towards him, whispering of deaths and blood. Their whispers would drown him, making him choke for air. The demons and ghosts would edge closer as well, take their chances when he was busy fighting them off from all sides, they would claw at him, demanding retribution for his past sins that made him covered in blood. They would scream at him and tell him what a liar he was, he did not deserve to have not even a short moment of happiness because they did not.

Would he have a blessed night, it would be a night where his few happy memories would act like a lighted candle, guarding him from the shadows and their smell of death and despair. Those were the nights were he could reach for his loved ones, those who had been taken too cruelly from him and ask for their reassurance that the shadows were lying. He basked in their presence and embraced it fully, like a man deprived from the sun for too long.

When he was awake, he made sure not to show his real self to the people around him. They were considering themselves as his friends. He liked them too much to let them be that. But he pretended though, he let them joke and make kind gestures that he did extended to them as well.

But Andrew Carter was not real, he never had been real. He was the person he hid behind, the person that he somehow wished that he actually was so he wouldn’t have to worry about his closing his eyes and meeting the shadows waiting to claw at him from all sides. He sometimes wondered what it would be like, to not be afraid to close your eyes and not feel your strength waver in the face of the shadows. He wondered how it would feel to stop fighting the shadows, to let them claw until he was no more.

His hand shook slightly as it closed tightly around the coffee cup in his hand as they sat around the table in the middle of the night, planning; always planning, always fighting for the side of the Angels. The other grumbled slightly of the lack of sleep, but for him it was another night he didn’t have drown in blood and fight shadows. He made a joke that fell flat, and he cursed himself when he realized that he let his mask slip. But he was too tired to deal with repercussions of that and just yawned and ignored the concerned gazes or the contemplative gaze thrown in his direction.

One day, his strength would waver, and when that happened, his mask would slip for good and the world would see the real him.

Until then, he would close his eyes and fight the shadows, wondering if he would ever open his eyes again.


End file.
